Chapter twenty one - Frank’s hospitalization.
I hopped over the barrier and kneeled next to him.
“frank, wake up. Please just wake up!” the tears flooded my eyes as I looked over his body.
Gerard was checking frank for a pulse. “he has a pulse so Atleast he’s alive.”
“that doesn’t mean shit gee! He could still fucking die!” I lifted frank’s head and put it on my lap. “GEE SAVE HIM!” I yelled.
“Alex, ray is calling an ambulance now. So relax.”
“I WON’T RELAX UNTIL I KNOW HE IS OKAY!” I kept my eyes down, looking at frank.
[an hour later at the hospital]
I sat on the edge of the bed holding frank’s hand.
“Alex. Come on. We’re staying at a hotel.” Gee said.
“you are. Not me. I won’t leave until frank is okay.” I glared over at gee.
“there is no way in hell I am letting you stay in this hospital.” gee said walking over.
“GERARD I AM NOT LEAVING FRANK’S SIDE!” I yelled and pushed his hand away from me.
“gee, let her stay here. She obviously won’t go with out a fight. She loves him and just wants to make sure he’s okay.” Mikey put his hand on his shoulder.
“fine.” Gee turned and walked out.
“thank you mikey.” I hugged him, “make sure gee isn’t mad at me.”
“alright. We’ll be back tomorrow.” he smiled and left as I gave everyone else a hug.
I pulled a chair over to the side of the bed. I rested my head on my arm. The sound of the heart monitor beeping was the only sound in the room. My eyes slowly started to close and I started to fall asleep.
[Frank’s POV (in his mind)]
I looked around.
“where is everyone?” the concert hall was empty. I walked to the back stage. No one was there either. I heard a voice I looked around franticly for the source.
Alex walked threw the door.
“hi babe.” she was wearing a formal dress. When I looked around we were no longer in the dressing room. We were in some sort of ball room. When I looked down I was in a tux. I smiled as she took my hand. We started to waltz. I never even knew I knew that dance. She smiled up at me.
“I love you Frank. Don’t ever forget that.” she pressed her body closer to mine.
“I love you too.” I closed my eyes. When I reopened them I was standing in the dressing room.
“Alex?” I looked around. I was all alone again. I sighed and sat down on the couch. I couldn’t remember what happened after I fell off the stage. I remembered falling and hitting my head hard. After that everything went black.
“OH MY GOD I’M DEAD!” my eyes got huge. “what about Alex?! I can’t leave her!”
I started to cry. I hadn’t cried since Alex got hurt. I couldn’t think of how she’d react if I died. “I can’t fucking die on her! I love her way to fucking much!”
I could feel myself drifting into a sleep.
“Alex, I’ll survive for you.” I whispered before my head hit the pillow.
[regular POV]
My eyes opened when I heard frank moan.
“frank?” I sat up and looked at him. He was still out and he was barely moving. I whined and layed my head back down.
“frank, I hope you are okay. Just wake up. I need you. Just wake up, please. Just wake up.” I started to cry. “I love you! Please, don’t die on me!” I covered my head with my free hand. “just wake up.”
I held his hand. It had to be about 3 am. I sighed and rested my head on top of our hands.
“frank. Please… wake up for me.” I sniffled as a tear hit the top of his hand.
[Frank’s POV (while Alex is talking)]
“Alex?!” I looked around. She appeared in front of me. Her eyes were red. She kept asking me to wake up.
“Alex. I am awake.” I looked at her. She grabbed my hand. I felt he tears hitting my hand.
“Alex. Don’t cry!” I pulled her into my arms and I held her closely. “Alex. I will wake up… just whenever I figure out how to.”
The room faded into black again. Everything was gone and it was just me. I sighed and fell to my knees.
“HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO WAKE UP?!” I screamed into the darkness. I felt the tears building up in my eyes. “I just need to wake up. For her! I love her! God, let me wake up!” I just let out the tears since no one was around. “I love her…..” the words went over and over in my mind. “oh my god. I am in love with her…. She is the one…” I smiled.
Chapter twenty two - problems
[regular POV]
I felt someone shaking me. I opened my eyes slowly. I looked up and saw Mikey.
“good morning.” he smiled.
“good morning.” I smiled and sat up.
“I brought coffee.” he handed me a cup.
“thanks so much.” I took a sip. “so is gee mad at me?”
“not sure. He wouldn’t talk to me. I think he’s just mad at frank.”
“but it wasn’t his fault.”
“not because of that. Because he made you love him. Gee isn’t okay with you guys. But if he makes you happy it makes him happy. He’s more upset since you are upset.”
“oh.” I looked at my coffee. “is gee coming in today?”
“not until later.” Mikey took a sip of coffee.
“can you tell him I’m sorry for putting him threw hell?”
Mikey looked up at me in shock. He smiled, “alright.” He wrapped his arm around my shoulder.
“mikey, do you know if Frank is going to be okay?” I looked over at him.
“yeah. He should be. He’s just in a coma now.”
“what if he never wakes up?” I looked up at mikey with tears in my eyes.
“we just have to wait it out.” he looked over at frank.
I whimpered and rested my head on the shoulder.
“it’ll be okay Alex. These things always end up okay.” he smiled and pulled me closer.
I hope so.
[later that day]
There was a knock on the door that woke me up. I sat up and rubbed my eyes.
“hi.” Gerard walked in. I looked back towards frank. I wasn’t sure if he was still upset. “Alex, can we talk?” he stood next to me. I looked up at him.
“alright.”
He held out his hand and I grabbed it. He walked outside with me. He stopped when he reached the doors leading out side, he opened one and walked out. I followed him.
“Alex.” he sighed.
“what?” I looked up at him.
“the tour has to keep going… even if it means without frank… we leave tomorrow at noon….”
My heart stopped, “Gerard…. I can’t leave him!” I shook my head rapidly as the tears burst from my eyes.
“Alex….” he sighed and put his hand on my shoulder, “that’s why I want you to stay here.”
I looked up at him in shock, “what?”
“I know how much frank means to you. I want you to be happy. So I decided to get you a hotel room for about a week. If frank isn’t better by then we will have you two sent back to new jersey.” he smiled, “also, mom agreed not to make you go to school until frank was okay.”
“Gerard…” I looked up and smiled. I hugged him tightly, “you rock.”
He smiled back, “just remember, if you aren’t in school try to get a part time job or something. Mom doesn’t want you to not do anything.”
“alright.”
“okay, I gotta go do a sound check for tonight. After the concert mikey is gonna get you a room and stuff.”
I nodded, “okay gee.” I hugged him. “good luck.”
“bye.”
“bye.” I smiled and opened the door. I made my way upstairs to Frank’s room. I couldn’t believe Gerard was letting me stay here until frank was better. Even though I wanted to be on tour with him, I’d rather make sure frank was okay. I opened the door and sat down in the chair next to the bed. The monitor beeps was the only sound coming from the room.
I got up and layed down on the couch next to the door. I started to fall back asleep since I hadn’t gotten much sleep the night before.
[Frank’s POV]
I walked around the place. It was the same set up as the Way house. I opened the door that lead to the backyard. Instead of the beautiful backyard at the way’s house, there was a grave yard. A few graves were open and there was caskets everywhere. I looked at each on as I went by. I heard a low rumbling and turned around. There was something climbing out of the casket. My heart started to race. I backed up and bumped into something. I turned sharply to face a zombie. My heart stopped and I screamed as it grabbed me.
“ALEX!!! HELPPPPP!!!!” I started to run. I wasn’t going very fast but it was fast enough to get away from them. I ran down the middle of the street.
This can’t be happening. I looked back to see how far the zombies were from me. They were following me pretty close. I ran into something and fell. I looked up. Alex was standing there smiling. She stood in between the zombies and me. She balled up her fist.
“FRANK WAKE UP! IT’S THE ONLY WAY TO SAVE US!” she screamed as they crowded around her.
“Alex, how!?”
“frank!!” her screams were muffled.
“ALEX!” I screamed and fell to my knees. “no….. Alex….” a few tears hit the pavement. “I’m sorry I couldn’t save you.” I sniffled.
I looked up. Alex was standing in front of me.
“Alex? Are you okay?” I stood up. We were back in the dressing room of the arena.
“frank. Just wake up.” she started to cry again.
“HOW ALEX?!” I got up to hug her.
“just wake up Frankie.” she vanished again. I fell forward. I started to cry, “how do I wake up Alex? I need you!” the tears poured down.
[regular POV]
The doctor came in.
“Alexandra way?”
I sat up, “yes?”
“I am going to do a check up on frank. So we will know what’s wrong with him. We’ll return in about an hour.”
“okay.” I smiled weakly.
The doctor left the room and two nurses moved frank from the bed and on to a stretcher they pushed it out of the room and down the hall.
I leaned back on the couch. I hope they can find out what was wrong and help him.
I started to get hungry. I got up and walked down stairs to the café. There wasn’t much to choose from so I grabbed a Pepsi and paid. I sat at a table and looked around. There was a lot of people in wheelchairs or on crutches. They had a person with them who was smiling and asking them how they were. I looked down at the bottle of Pepsi before me.
I sighed.
Why couldn’t frank be in a wheel chair. At least then I knew he was okay.
“Alex!” Michelle ran over and sat at the table with me, “why aren’t you coming with us?”
I kept my eyes on the bottle, “I refuse to leave frank here alone.”
“Alex, we need you on tour with us. You were gonna take frank’s position.”
“no one can take Frank’s place!” I stood up. “I am staying here and that’s it!”
“Alex…”
“no!” I walked out of the café. I knew Michelle was going to follow me up but I didn’t care I just wanted to get back to the room and wait for the doctors to say frank was okay.
“Alex, you must really love him.” she sat next to me.
“yes Michelle. I do. And I have know clue what I would do if he died.” I covered my face.
“aw.” she smiled, “THAT’S SO CUTE!”
I looked up at her and started to laugh.
“so you’re going to wait it out?”
“yeah.” I looked over towards the bed. “it’s the only way I will know he didn’t die.”
“then I’m staying with you!”
I looked over at her, “why?”
“the only reason I went on tour with the guys was so I could hang out with you.” she smiled, “you’re my best friend. How could I give up the oprotuty?”
I laughed, “alright. I’ll tell mikey to get us a room after the concert tonight.” I smiled.
“YES! IT WILL BE LIKE A CONSTANT PARTY!!!” she started to laugh.
“Ms. Iero?” I looked up at the doctor. “Frank is okay. There is no permant damage. Although he did fracture his arm.”
“when is he going to be awake?” I stood up.
“there is no way to tell. I’m sorry.” the doctor walked out of the room. The nurses had just finish placing frank back in the bed and left. I walked over and put my hand on his.
“Alex, I’m sorry.”
“it’s not anyone’s fault.” I looked down. “I just hope he comes out of it soon.” my eyes water up.
My cell phone rang, “hello?”
“Alex, I heard about frank. I am so sorry.” Seth said.
I clenched my jaw, “you don’t care. You never did! STOP LIEING SETH! THERE IS NO WAY IN HELL I WILL EVER TRUST YOU AGAIN!”
“Alex, I’m not lying. I am sorry.”
“BULL SHIT!” I screamed and hung up the phone.
“what was that about?” Michelle looked at me.
“Seth just wants to date me so he is lying about caring that frank was in a coma.” I grinded my teeth together.
“oh my god. He needs to get a life!”
“I know.” I looked at frank. “he actually told me to dump frank for him. I could never do that. I’d rather be single.” I put my hand back on Frank’s.
“he’s an asshole.” she said sitting down.
[4 hours later]
“hey Alex, did you know that people in coma’s can still hear?” Michelle had been looking on the internet from her phone.
“really? Let me see.” she handed her phone to me.
“DO PEOPLE IN COMA HEAR?
People in coma sometimes show signs that they are able to hear and understand. Often these signs are just simple reflexes -- like squeezing a hand, or sucking, in response to a touch. Occasionally people in coma seem to become calm when they hear a familiar voice. Since they almost never remember these events, it is impossible to decide if they actually recognized a void or understand what was said. However, as a rule, it is good to talk to and about people in coma as though they could hear and understand what was being said.” I read it out loud and smiled.
“so that means that if you’re talking to Frank he may be able to hear?” she looked at me as I handed her phone back.
“yeah.” I looked over at him and smiled. so everything I said, he could probably hear.
“cool. Well, I’m going to the concert. You coming?”
“no I’m going to stay here.”
“alright. I’ll tell the guys I’ll be with you and so on.” she smiled and hugged me.
“alright. Bye.”
“bye.” she said walking out of the room. I walked over and sat in the chair by frank’s bed.
I smiled and grabbed his hand.
“frank I know you can most likely hear me so I just wanted to say….”
[Frank’s POV]
“…and I love you.” Alex was holding me closely.
“I know. Just please don’t leave me again.” I put my hands in her’s.
“frank, I need you to wake up. Just please, wake up. I miss you.” she kissed my forehead.
“Alex, how do I wake up?” I looked at her, with tears in my eyes.
“frank please wake up.” I felt her tears hit my hand.
Everything went black as Alex’s voice faded.
[regular POV]
“just wake up.” I cried. “please frank.”
“what do you mean?”
I looked up in shock. Frank’s eyes were open and he was looking at me. “f-frank?”
I rubbed my eyes in disbelief.
“yeah?” he looked at me and smiled.
“frank, you’re awake!!” I hugged him. He put his arms around my waist and pulled me closely. I let go of him and sat on the edge of the bed. I kissed his forehead.
“I thought you were never going to wake up!” the tears flooded my eyes.
He smiled and put his arm around my waist, “but I did.”
I nodded and started to cry uncontrobally.
[meanwhile. Gerard’s POV]
“alright guys. With out frank here it may be a little harder but we have a back up.” I said.
“alright.” Mikey looked down.
“mikey what’s wrong?” I looked over at him.
“nothing, I just hope Frank is okay. I’ve never seen Alex so upset.”
“I know. She wouldn’t even talk to me right after it happened.” Ray said.
“I kn-” my ring tone cut me off. I opened my cell phone.
“hello?”
“GERARD! PUT ME ON SPEAKER!” Alex yelled. I put the phone on speaker.
“so what was so important?” I asked.
“FRANK IS AWAKE! HE JUST WOKE UP!!” Alex was screaming.
“OH MY GOD!” Mikey yelled.
“THAT’S FUCKING AMAZING!!” I smiled.
“I know. Alright well I have to go. They are going to put Frank’s arm in a splint. And then if nothing is wrong we can leave.”
“oh my god. Awesome!” Mikey smiled.
“bye.”
“bye.” I closed the phone.
Chapter twenty three - oh my god…. GERARD!
[regular POV (three hours later)]
I was sitting on the edge of the bed, talking to frank. His arm was wrapped in a splint and an ace bandage. I heard the door open. I looked up.
“LOOK HE’S AWAKE!” Michelle yelled as she ran over and gave Frank a hug.
“Michelle, watch the arm!” he pulled his arm to the side.
“my bad.” she laughed.
Mikey, Ray and Bob walked in.
“MIKEY!” I ran over and hugged him.
“hi.” he smiled.
I let go and looked around, “where’s gee?”
“I’m here!” he walked through the door.
“Gerard!” I hugged him and he fell. I looked at him. His face was pale and his eyes were glossy. I stood up and backed away. “Gerard….” I looked at him. “YOU’RE HIGH!” I started to get pissed off.
“no.”
“Gerard don’t bull shit me! You are fucking high. You’ve been doing drugs and I know about the coke you got two weeks ago! I was outside when you paid the guy.” I could feel Mikey touching my shoulder.
“Alex..”
“FUCK YOU GERARD! YOU WERE MY HERO BUT YOU JUST FUCKING RUINED THAT!” I closed my eyes tightly. “I FUCKING HATE YOU!” I turned around and burried my face in Mikey’s shirt.
I heard the door close. I knew Gerard had left.
“I need a fucking cigarette.” I said walking out.
“I’ll come!” Michelle ran to catch up with me.
I leaned on the wall. I lit a cigarette and took a drag.
“you okay?” Michelle asked lighting on of her own.
“I guess. I just can’t believe Gee would do that… he was my hero… he was the one who inspired me the most.” I shook my head, “but those days are over.” I sighed heavily.
“Alex, they don’t have to be. All you have to do is show gee how much he hurts people when he’s high or drunk.”
“how am I supposed to do that? He isn’t violent.”
“no Alex, like emotionally.” I looked at her confused.
“explain.”
“like you know how you got upset when you thought gee was doing drugs and drinking to much at that club?” I nodded. “like that! You need to show him that his habits are hurting the people he loves.”
“oh my god. MICHELLE YOU ARE A GENIOUS!!” I hugged her.
“I know.” she laughed.
[two hours later]
The doctor walked into the room.
Frank looked up, “what’s up doc?” he laughed.
“Frank….” the doctor looked down.
“is frank going to be okay?” I looked up at him.
“yeah, he’s going to be fine. I’m just going to miss having him around.”
“NOT FUNNY! HOW DARE YOU MAKE ME WORRY!” I yelled.
“my bad.” he laughed. “frank you’re free to go as of tomorrow at 10.”
“finally.” he laughed.
“so Alex, you spending the night here or on the tour bus?” Ray asked.
“here duh.” I laughed. I turned to Frank and smiled. I sat down in the bed next to him, resting my head on his shoulder.
“alright Alex. We’re gonna go get on the tour bus. Probably going to work on more songs. See you tomorrow.” Ray said hugging me.
“BOB I WANT A HUG!” I ran over and hugged bob.
“oh my.” he laughed and I hugged him.
“bye.” I smiled cutely. I walked back over to the bed and sat next to Frank.
“mikey, before you go, can you make sure Gerard is okay? I didn’t mean to yell at him like that. I was just really hurt.” I looked away as mikey hugged me.
“alright lexi. Bye.”
“bye.” I looked down.
“Alex.” I felt frank’s hand on my back. “I know you only said all of that out of anger… but ever think Gerard may have taken it seriously.”
My heart stopped, “you don’t think he would… right?”
I looked at frank.
“maybe.”
“I’ll be back.” I ran out of the room and outside of the hospital. “GERARD!!” I looked around panicking. I walked down an alley. “Gerard?” I looked all over.
“you know it isn’t safe to be in dark alleys alone?”
I turned sharply. Gerard was standing there. He swayed a little.
“GERARD!” I hugged him. I looked up with tears rolling down my cheeks. “gee, I didn’t mean any of the stuff I said before! You will always be my hero. I don’t hate you! I don’t care if you are drunk or high. I don’t care as long as you are alive!” I covered my face while I cried. He hugged me.
“Alex, it’s okay.” he smiled. “I’m going to go pass out on the tour bus.”
“alright gee. I’ll wake with you.” I put my arm around him as we started to walk.
Gerard was swaying and stumbling over nothing.
“alright gee. I’m going back into the hospital. Go get some sleep.” I hugged him and left.
“was he okay?” Frank asked when I walked into the room.
I nodded and layed back down next to him. I rested my head on his chest and sighed.
“Alex. It’s okay.” he put his arm around me.
“I know.” I moved closer to him.
“now get some sleep.” he smiled and kissed my forehead.
“night.” I closed my eyes as frank wrapped the blanket around us.
Chapter twenty four- new jersey? Without me?
I opened my eyes slowly. I looked around. I wasn’t at the hospital anymore. I was in the tour bus. I climbed out of the bunk and walked into the living area.
“well, good morning.” Mikey said smiling.
I looked at my cellphone, “it’s 8 o‘clock. At night.”
He started to laugh, “I know.”
“how come you didn’t wake me up at the hospital?”
“we did you wouldn’t wake up.” Ray said as he walked past me.
“oh.” I looked around.
“where is everyone?”
“Gerard and Frank are asleep and Bob is right over there.” Ray said pointing behind me.
I turned, “OH MY GOD! I’M SORRY BOB!” I hugged him, “I didn’t notice you.”
“it’s fine.” he smiled. I walked over and grabbed the pot of coffee.
“damn mike. You drank all of that?”
“maybe.” he laughed.
I sighed and started another pot. I sat across from Mikey and looked down.
“something on your mind?” Mikey looked at me.
“no.”
“you know I will always be here for you.”
“I know mikey.” I smiled weakly. I noticed Frank walk out of the bunk area.
“hi frank.” I smiled as he kissed me and poured a cup of coffee.
“want one?”
I nodded as he handed me a cup of coffee. He sat next to me and put his arm around me.
“how’s your arm?” I looked over at him.
“the splint is a bitch to sleep in.” he laughed.
“oh.” I smiled as Gerard walked out of the bunk area, “hi gee.”
He mumbled and poured a cup of coffee.
“Gerard are you okay?” Frank asked putting his hand on his shoulder.
“FUCK OFF FRANK!” the look in Gerard’s eyes scared me. It was like he wasn’t himself.
“gee chill. He just asked if you were okay.”
“fuck you too you little bitch.”
My jaw dropped as Gerard spoke. I climbed over Frank and stood in front of Gerard.
“WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST SAY!”
“fuck you too you little bitch.” he spoke slowly.
I slapped him as hard as I could.
“all we fucking asked was if you were okay. And you treat us like shit for caring! What that fuck Gerard!”
“FUCK OFF!” he pushed me out of the way. I fell to the ground and looked up at him.
I got up quickly.
“GERARD, YOU ARE SUCH A FUCKING DICK!” I pushed him out of the way and walked over to my bunk. I climbed in and closed the curtain. I heard someone walk by.
The curtain opened.
“what?” I looked at Frank.
“are you okay?” he sat on the bed and closed the curtain.
“no.”
He leaned forward and kissed me. I smiled, “a little better now.”
He pushed me so I was laying down and he kissed me again. My face started to get hotter as he moved his hands up my side. He kissed my lips lightly and started to kiss my neck.
I heard someone walking over so I pushed frank off of me. The curtain opened and Gerard kneeled down.
“Alex, listen…”
“NO GERARD!” I got up and walked away. Gerard followed me into the living area.
“gee leave her alone. Obviously she doesn’t want to talk!”
“this doesn’t involve you!” Gerard slammed frank back. He fell to the ground.
I covered my mouth as I looked at frank. You could see the rage building up in his eyes.
“Frank don’t!”
“THAT’S FUCKING IT! THAT IS THE LAST FUCKING STRAW!” Frank stood up and walked towards the door. “UNTIL YOU BECOME SOBER I WON’T BE AROUND!”
“frank what about the band?” Ray asked standing up.
“Alex knows my parts. She can play for me.” Frank said as he headed for the door. I wrapped my arms around his stomach.
“FRANK! PLEASE DON’T LEAVE!!”
“Alex..” he moved my hands and opened the door to get off the bus. We were at a rest stop somewhere in Washington. It was about 10 pm.
I fell to my knees crying. Mikey walked over and kneeled next to me.
“it’s okay lexi.”
“NO IT’S NOT! I HAVE TO STOP HIM!” I sprinted off the bus after Frank. I didn’t see him anywhere. I looked around frantically.
“frank?” I walked over to the bathrooms and looked around
I walked around a corner and noticed him sitting on the ground with his cellphone to his ear. I sat next to him knowing he probably wouldn’t notice.
“no, I am catching a plane back tomorrow afternoon.”
The person responded and frank shook his head.
“no mom. I’m going to be alone. Alex’s taking my place in the band.” there was a pause, “alright mom. I’ll see you tomorrow night. Bye.”
He closed his phone and sighed.
“you aren’t going back alone.” I said looking straight ahead.
“Alex…”
“frank, I went on tour with you guys for you and to be with my friends and family. With out you I don’t want to be here.” I looked over at him.
“I thought you didn’t want the band to suffer.”
“fuck the band. Gerard is making it suffer enough. We need you.”
Frank was silent as he looked at the ground, “I’m going back to jersey with out you. You need to help the band.”
“frank I-”
“no Alex. That’s final.” frank said walking away. I pulled my knees to my chest and covered my head. The tears poured down my cheeks.
“frank… I… need you!” I said threw tears. I stood up and slowly made my way back to the tour bus. I was still crying when I walked on the bus.
“Alex, where is Frank?” Ray asked as I stood there staring at the ground.
“he’s gone. AND IT’S ALL YOUR FAULT!” I glared over at Gerard. “Why did you have to make Frank leave?! I can’t believe you sometimes.” I shook my head and walked by him. I climbed into Frank’s bunk since I needed to feel comforted. There was a picture of us backstage at the concert in New Jersey. I sniffled as I looked at it. The memories of me and Frank flooded back. I sniffled as they played in my mind.
Flashback #1
“HI ALEX!” Frank smiled as he looked at me. I looked up at him and laughed.
He was hanging upside down looking into my bunk. I started to laugh as he hung there.
“what don’t I get a kiss?”
I laughed.
“QUICK! Before all the blood rushes to my head!” he laughed.
I sat up and kissed him.
“YES!” he laughed and got down from his bunk.
“I love you frank.” I smiled and hugged him.
Flashback #2
I walked around the hotel lobby looking for frank. He couldn’t be found anywhere. I walked by a plant.
“why hello there!” I stopped and looked at the plant. “you know I can see up your skirt.” there was a walkie talkie in the plant. I picked it up and pushed the button.
“oh my.. Kinky.” I started to laugh as frank wrapped his arms around my stomach. I turned and kissed him.
Flashback #3
Frank was looking in the mirror, doing his make up for the concert. I ducked down and snuck over to behind him. When he looked down I stood up.
He looked in the mirror and jumped. He smiled and grabbed me. My face turned red as he kissed me.
Flashback #4
I headed towards my room. Frank was still asleep in my bed. I smiled evilly as I walked over and bent over him. I poked his cheek. He didn’t budge so I whispered in his ear.
“Frankie.”
He didn’t move.
“WAKE THE FUCK UP!” I punched him in the arm playfully.
“five more minutes.” he rolled over on to his back.
“NO!” I sat on his chest and stared at him.
“please?”
“nope.” I leaned forward, planning on scaring him when he opened his eyes. He didn’t open his eyes. He grabbed my hips, causing me to scream. He opened his eyes and started to laugh.
“you really thought you would get me?” he asked as I got off of him.
“not really.” I laughed.
Flash back #5
“Alex, you okay?” I couldn’t see who it was but I knew it wasn’t mikey or Gerard.
I sniffled, “I guess.” I turned on the light next to my bed. Frank stood in front of me.
“you know, you’re a lot prettier when you aren’t crying.” he sat next to me.
“obviously not. Seth stood me up. I can’t be pretty.” I wiped my eyes as I felt frank’s arm wrap around me.
“you are. Seth is just retarded to stand up a girl like you. You’re fucking amazing.” he rested his head on mine.
I sighed deeply, “whatever.” the tears burned my eyes.
“Alex.” frank moved my head so I was looking at him. My eyes were full of tears but I wouldn’t allow them to fall. “you are beautiful. And….” he stopped and looked into my eyes. My face got hotter and my heart sped up. Frank smiled and leaned in little. My heart sped up and it got harder to breath. “the more I think about it……” he leaned in closer. I could fell his breath on my lips. I could feel his arms wrapping around me. “you’re perfect.” he kissed me. His lips were amazingly soft. My heart skipped a beat. He pulled back.
“Alex? You look sick… did I do something wrong?” he looked upset as he let go. I couldn’t speak and my breath got shorter. My hands started to get clammy. I smiled.
“no. you didn’t.” my heart started to slow down a little.
End of flash backs.
I started to cry. I took the picture down and hid it under the mattress. I didn’t want to look at how happy we were. I missed him already and it hadn’t even been an hour. I felt the bus start. My heart beat quickened. My eyes swelled with tears. it looks like Frank was serious about leaving us…. I sighed and climbed out of his bunk. I walked out into the living area. I grabbed a cup out of the cabinets and pour myself some coffee. I sat across from Ray. He smiled when I looked up at him. I just looked back down at my coffee.
I sighed as I reached into my pocket and pulled out my pack of cigarettes. I lit one and opened the window. I took a drag.
“you smoke?” Ray asked.
I nodded. Gerard and Mikey were asleep in their bunks so I didn’t have to worry about them finding out. I flicked the ashes out the window.
“Alex are you going to be okay now that frank is gone?” Michelle sat next to me.
“I have no clue.” I took a drag and put out the cigarette. I tossed it out the window and closed it. I sighed.
“this sucks. I’ve never seen you this depressed.” Bob said as he took the empty seat next to Ray.
“well, you can thank Gerard for this.” I stuck the rest of my cigarettes in my pocket along with my lighter.
It was silent.
“I’ll be in frank’s bunk if you need me.” I stopped near the bathroom, “try not to need me.” I walked over and climbed into Frank’s bunk. I grabbed one of his sweatshirts from the storage underneath. I put it on and layed down in his bed. I was tired but wasn’t sure if I wanted to sleep. My phone rang. I looked at it. one message received.
I opened it.
“Alex, I’m leaving tomorrow. I’ll be back in Jersey. Please just go on and help the band. It would mean a lot to me. - Frank.”
I sighed and pressed reply.
“fine.” I sent it and closed my phone. I hugged the pillow tightly.
My phone rang again. I opened it.
“thank you babe. Have fun.” I sighed and closed it. I didn’t want to reply. It hurt too much.
My phone rang again I looked over and opened it. “hello?”
“hello sweetie.”
“hi mom.” I sighed deeply.
“how are my children doing?” she sounded happier then usual.
“fine.”
“tell me what’s on your mind honey. I know something is wrong.”
I desperately wanted to tell my mom what Gerard was doing but I couldn’t bring myself to do it.
“nothing. Isn’t it like 2 am there?”
“yes. I wanted to talk to my children.”
I laughed, “well, Gerard and Mikey are asleep and I’m about to go to sleep.”
“oh okay honey, have fun on tour. Call me soon.”
“alright mom. Bye.”
“bye.” she hung up.
I sighed deeply and pulled Frank’s pillow close. I closed my eyes tightly and started to drift off.
Chapter Twenty five- Kickball and sickness
[Mikey’s POV]
“Where’s Lexi?” I asked pouring a cup of coffee.
“Still asleep in frank’s bunk.” Bob said as he flipped the page in a magazine.
“she’s been asleep since 10 last night. And it’s four now.” Ray said.
“I’m going to wake her up 16 hours of sleep isn’t healthy.” I said walking into the bunk area. I opened the curtain to frank’s bunk and nudged Lexi.
“Lexi, wake up.” I shook her arm slightly. She looked pale and she was really hot.
“Bob, come here and carry Lexi.”
Bob walked in and picked up Lexi. He carried her into the living area and put her on the couch.
“guys she doesn’t look okay.” Bob said putting his hand on her forehead.
“I know.” I started to make another pot of coffee thinking it may help wake her up.
[Regular POV]
I opened my eyes slowly.
“SHE’S ALIVE!” Bob yelled.
“yeah. Of course I am.” I sat up. I had an icepack on my forehead.
“Alex, you had a fever of 104.” Gerard said, he was sitting at the end of the couch.
“oh.” I looked down. It would explain why I felt dizzy.
“Lexi, do you still want to go on tonight?” Mikey asked handing me coffee.
“yeah, I can’t let the band suffer.” I smiled.
“Alex.. I can’t let you.” Gerard said getting up.
“Gerard, you guys need me! With out frank the songs won’t sound right!” I stood up and fell back down.
“Alex, you can barely stand.”
I stood back up. I was swaying a little, “Gerard I promised frank I would take his spot on the tour! I won’t let you make me break the promise!”
“fine. The moment you get sick I want you off the stage!”
“alright Gerard.” I sat back down and took a sip of the coffee. Michelle looked at me funny.
“what?” I looked up at her.
“your pale.”
“thank you captain obvious!” I laughed. She started to laugh and sat next to me.
“god, it’s going to be lonely in the mosh pits with out you.”
“I know.” I sighed, “but I promised frank I would take his place.”
“I know.” Michelle smiled. “just have fun up there.”
“thanks.” I smiled back weakly. I still didn’t feel good but I wasn’t going to tell the guys that.
“sound check in 15 minutes.” Ray said as he helped me up.
“Thanks Ray.” I headed into the bunk area and grabbed my black skinny jeans and a tank top. I walked into the bathroom and locked the door. I changed quickly and put Frank’s sweatshirt back on. I wanted something to remind me of him while I was on stage. I grabbed my eyeliner out of my makeup bag. I started to put it on.
“Lexi.” I heard Mikey knock on the door.
I unlocked it and looked at him.
“Phone.” he handed me my cellphone which was ringing. I looked at it.
Seth calling….
I handed it back, “I don’t want to talk to him. Just let it ring.” I turned back to the mirror and finished my makeup.
“alright.” he smiled. “want more coffee? You still look exhausted.”
“yeah mikey.” I smiled and grabbed my clothes off the ground. I carried them over to my bunk and dropped them.
“ALEX!” Gerard yelled from the kitchen. I walked in.
“yeah?”
“does it look even?” He pointed to his eyes. He had the start of his makeup on.
“um… hold still.” I smudged part of it so it was even. “there.” I smiled.
“thanks.” he smiled, “um… are you still mad at me?” he started to touch up the black on the bar to make it darker.
“no Gerard.” I sighed. The truth was I despised him for making frank leave but I still loved him since he was my brother.
“Alex, I’m sorry about all of that. And I am sorry I fucked up being your hero.” He pinned the arm band on. “I didn’t really want you to see me like that.”
“Gerard it’s fine.” I looked down at the floor.
“that’s one of your best qualities.” he smiled and hugged me.
I smiled back. I went to walk back to my bunk.
“Alex, wait.”
I turned and Gerard handed me an arm band.
“you’re gonna need this.” he smiled, “and to try and get frank’s style down.”
I smiled weakly, “alright.” I wanted back into the bunk area and grabbed Frank’s white shirt, vest and his tie. I walked into the bathroom and changed again. I dropped my clothes on the bed and walked back to the living area.
“shit, Mikey can you tie this?” I walked over, handing him my tie.
“yeah.” he smiled and tied it.
“thanks.” I smiled and finished putting on the arm band. I walked over and grabbed the black eyeliner off of the counter and started to do the “x”s over my eyes. I finished and started to drink the coffee mikey had made for me.
“are you ready?” Bob asked as he walked by me.
“fuck yes!” I smiled and followed the guys off the bus. We walked into the arena.
Michelle laughed and ran to the front of the stage.
“I’LL BE RIGHT HERE!” she moved over a little, “or maybe here.”
I laughed as I watched her try and figure out where she would be. My head started to hurt pretty bad.
“Michelle.” I walked over, “can you run back to the bus and get me some Advil?”
“alright.” she smiled and ran out of the arena.
“ALEX!” Ray yelled calling me over to the stage. I sprinted over and took my place, Picking up frank’s guitar. I looked down and played a few notes to make sure it sounded okay.
“lexi, play Vampires Will Never Hurt You since we are going to start with that.”
Mikey said. I began to play and he joined in. I smiled and looked up at him.
Michelle ran over to the edge of the stage. “here.” she handed me two pills. I swallowed them dry and stood back up.
“thanks.” I smiled. I kept playing notes from Vampires will never hurt you. I needed to get used to playing on Frank’s guitar since his was a little different then mine.
“Nervous?” Mikey asked as he kept playing.
“a little.” I bit my lip.
“don’t be. You were great the first time and you will be this time.” he smiled and gave me a quick hug.
“thanks Mike.” I smiled.
[1 hour later]
The arena was full of screaming fans. We walked on stage and the screaming grew louder.
Gerard smiled as we started to play vampires will never hurt you. My head still hurt pretty bad as we went on.
The song ended. I put my hand on my forehead. It hurt really bad. Gerard walked over and whispered to play Drowning Lessons next. I nodded and looked over at Michelle who was directly in front of me. She stuck out her tounge so I started to giggle.
I looked over at Gerard who gave me the cue to start. I started to play, ignoring the massive pain in my head.
When the song ended Gerard walked over.
“you okay?”
I nodded.
“alright, Give ‘em hell kid.” he smiled.
I nodded again and looked over at the guys. They smiled at me. I smiled weakly back.
“LET’S GIVE ‘EM HELL!” Gerard screamed as we started to play.
It felt like years until the set ended.
“GOODNIGHT!” Gerard screamed and ran off the stage. I followed him along with Mikey, Ray and Bob. We walked into the dressing room and sat down.
“great job Alex.” Bob gave me a hug.
“thanks.” I looked in the mirror. I was paler then usual. Gerard’s cellphone started to ring.
“GEE!” I yelled.
“can you answer it?”
I sighed and opened his phone.
“hello?”
“”Alex, it’s Brian, where’s Gerard?” Brian was our manager. He sounded excited.
“right here. Hold on.” I handed the phone to Gerard, “it’s Brian.”
“oh, Hello.” he said into the phone. He got up and left the room.
I sat on the couch. I kept my eyes on the door. Michelle walked in.
“ALEX YOU ROCKED!” she hugged me.
“thanks.” I smiled,
“or should I say Frank?” she laughed. I was still in Frank’s clothes since I was too lazy to change. “feel better?”
“not really.” I frowned. “the whole time we were up there my head killed.”
“you’re head is a murderer!” she laughed.
“I KNOW WHAT WILL MAKE IT BETTER!” Mikey smiled.
“what?” Ray looked up at him.
“KICKBALL!” he laughed and held up a ball.
“Alright Mikey. When Gee gets back in.” I smiled.
Gerard walked in.
“GREAT NEWS!!” he smiled. “as of next week they will be videotaping us.”
“what?” I looked up at Gerard.
“they are going to have people video taping us. We are doing a behind the scenes thing and calling it Life On The Murder Scene.” he smiled.
“Gerard, what about Frank?” my eyes swelled with tears.
“we have to get him back before next week!” Michelle said.
“he said he wouldn’t come back until Gerard sobered up.” I looked down, “how are we going to get him back?”
“tell frank we need him to help Gerard. Since he left Gerard’s drinking and pill popping got worse.” Ray said looking over at Gerard , “which it has.”
“ha-ha. Funny ray.” Gerard said opening another beer.
“um… guys?” Mikey held up the kickball.
“Alright Mikey come on.” Gerard walked out into the arena. We all followed.
“ooh! Can I be captain?” Michelle raised her hand excitedly.
“alright. And I’ll be the other captain.” I said walking over to Michelle. “you pick first.” I smiled.
“alright, Mikey.” she smiled as mikey walked over and hugged her.
“Gerard.” I smiled.
“um.. Bob.”
“Ray.”
“do we have to pick the crew members?” Michelle laughed.
“how about MCR verses the crew?” Mikey suggested.
“alright.” I smiled.
“So the crew is up to bat first.” Mikey laughed. I laughed and took my spot at first base.
Chapter Twenty six- The same night sky.
[20 minutes later]
“guys, I’m going to sit the rest out.” I walked over to the side and sat down.
“you okay?” Mikey looked down.
I nodded, “just a little dizzy.”
“Alright.” he smiled and went back to playing. I watched as Gerard kept falling every time he kicked the ball or tried to catch it. I sighed and opened my cellphone. It was midnight. I sighed and closed it. I got up and walked over to Michelle.
“I’m going to be on the tour bus. I’m exhausted.”
“alright.” she smiled.
I walked outside and over to the tour bus. I lit a cigarette and leaned on the bus. I stared at the sky. It was so clear out tonight you could see the stars. I sighed deeply and sat on the ground. I started to sing Heaven help us. I wasn’t sure why but it almost always made me feel better.
In New Jersey, Frank is probably looking up at the same night sky….
[Frank’s POV]
I sighed as I looked back down. The sky was clear for once.
“Here Frank.” my mom handed me a blanket. “it’s cold.”
“thanks mom.” I wrapped it around myself. She sat next to me.
“you miss her don’t you?”
“yeah.” I sighed and took a drag from my cigarette.
“then why did you leave her?”
“it’s Gerard’s fault. He pushed me to much. I coul-”
“Frank, Gerard is your best friend. You should be out there helping him with his problem. Give him support. You two are closer then any two other people I have met.” She kept her eyes straight ahead. She stood up. “just remember that he was there when no one else was.”
I heard the door close. I sniffled as the tears rolled down my cheeks. god I hate it when she’s right.
[regular POV]
I put out my cigarette and stood up. I opened the door and walked in. I sighed as I grabbed Frank’s sweatshirt off my bed. I looked in the mirror. I still had my stuff on from the concert. I looked a lot like frank since I had everything on that was his.
I sighed as the tears fell down. I opened the door and sat on the ground again. I put on the sweatshirt and held it close. I felt something poke me. I looked in the pocket. There was a piece of folded up paper. I pulled it out and opened it.
“Alex,
You have wowed me from the very beginning. You don't have to be perfect, to be perfect for me. The way you look at me let’s me know you care.
The first concert when I looked down and saw you there it made me smile.
When I was in a coma, I heard your voice. All I thought about was you. When I opened my eyes and saw you I couldn’t have been happier.
I love you so much.
-Frank.”
Tears rolled down my cheek. “I love you too Frank.” I whispered as I held the note closely.
Chapter twenty seven- Going home.
[the next day]
“good morning Alex!” Michelle smiled.
“yeah.” I grumbled and poured a cup of coffee.
“you seem happy this morning.” she laughed.
“yeah. I spent all night thinking.”
“about?”
“Frank.”
“oh.” she looked down.
“are the guys up?” I looked around.
“in the back room.” she smiled.
“alright.” I walked into the back room. “guys, can I talk to you?”
“yeah, what’s on your mind?” Ray said taking the headphones off.
“um… guys…. I’m going to leave.”
“what do you mean?” Bob said. I looked down. Every one was looking at me.
“I am leaving. Going back to jersey.”
“WHAT?!” Gerard stood up, “WHY?!”
“I want to be with frank. I miss him a lot.”
“Lexi! You can’t leave us!” Mikey looked up at me.
“mikey…”
“no lexi. You can’t leave us! We need you here! We took you with us since we knew how bad it hurt you when we left. We’ve only been on tour for a month!” Mikey’s eyes seemed to be watering up.
“mikey, I’m sorry.”
“Alex, are you sure?” Gerard walked over and stood next to me.
“I’m sure.” I nodded slightly.
“guys, we rightfully can’t tell her not to leave.” Ray looked over at me.
“Alex, if you want to leave…. We won’t hold you back.”
I nodded, “thanks guys.” I headed back out into the living area with Michelle. I wasn’t going to tell her I was leaving. I sat down and took a sip of my coffee.
“Alex, are you okay? You look like you are going to cry.” she put her hand on my arm.
“I probably am.”
“WHAT?! WHY?!”
I sighed, “Michelle promise me you won’t get mad at me.”
“okay.” she looked at me weird.
“I’m leaving.”
“to go where?”
“back to jersey.” I looked down at my coffee.
“… you’re coming back right?” she looked at me.
“no. I’m staying there. I’m going back home. Back to school, back to Frank.”
She looked down, “but, I came on tour with you…. You were the reason I came. Not Mikey.”
“I know.” I took a sip of coffee.
She started to cry, “Alex, I don’t want you to leave!”
“I’m sorry.” I looked down. A few tears landed in my coffee. I took the note out of the sweatshirt pocket and handed it to her.
“what’s this?” she asked opening it.
“just read it.” I kept my eyes locked on my cup.
“Alex….”
“Frank had it in his pocket. I opened it last night. This is why I am going back home.” I sniffled.
She sighed and stood up, “well, have fun.”
I looked up at her, “Michelle…” she walked out of the room.
I sighed and stared at the table. I could see the tears hitting the table.
… why is it every time I am happy…. Everyone else isn’t?
Chapter twenty eight- Suicide.
“When do you leave?” Gerard asked as he opened another beer.
“Sunday morning. I figured I’d stay for the last concert this week. Make it easier on you guys.” I looked down.
“alright.” he forced himself to smile.
“Gerard, I’m sorry.”
“don’t be. It’s your choice. If going back to jersey makes you happy then that’s good enough for me.” he wrapped one arm around me and pulled me closer.
“alright.” I sighed and looked down.
“Lexi.”
I looked up at Mikey who was smiling at me. “what?”
“phone.” he handed me my cell phone.
“hello?”
“hey.” my heart stopped when I heard Frank’s voice.
“Frank…” my eyes started to water up.
“yeah. Are you okay?”
“um.. Hold on a second.” I looked out the window. We were pulling into a parking lot. Most likely where the arena was. When we stopped I walked outside.
“okay. Sorry. I wanted some privacy.”
“it’s okay.” I heard him laugh.
“Frank, I’m going back to Jersey.”
“what?”
I sighed, “ I am going back home. I want to be with you.” a few tears slid down my cheeks.
“Alex, don’t.”
“why not frank? I want to be with you.” I sat on the ground and took a deep breathe.
“Alex, you aren’t coming back. I won’t let you go.”
“But Frank…”
“NO. Alex, the band needs you!” Frank seemed to be angry.
“FRANK I WANT TO BE WITH YOU!”
“I don’t care Alex! You promised me that you would stay and take my place while I was gone!”
I was silent. I couldn’t believe he was yelling at me for wanting to be with him.
“Alex?”
“what?” I barely spoke. I could feel the tears building up.
“I’m sorry.” he sighed, “I don’t want the band to suffer. I don’t want you to come back since the band would have to find another player.”
“I know frank but I really want to go home and be with you.”
He sighed, “Alex…. I guess it’s your choice…. I have to go. Bye.”
“bye.” I hung up the phone as I wiped my eyes. I got back on the bus.
“hey Alex.” Gerard smiled.
“hi.” I looked down. “how many beers have you had today?”
“I don’t know.” he said as he opened yet another.
I opened the fridge and looked in the box of beer. “Gerard there’s one left! We just got it yesterday!” I closed the door and looked over at him.
“so?”
“GERARD YOU NEED HELP!”
“No I don’t! I have it under control.”
“um… guys… what happened to all of the Advil?” Ray asked holding up the empty bottle of Advil.
I looked over at Gerard. He looked at Ray and then back at me. I shook my head and walked into the back room. Mikey looked up at me.
“what’s wrong?”
I sighed and sat next to him, “I can’t go back to jersey with Gerard always being high or drunk.” I leaned back on the couch.
“don’t worry. Go back to jersey. I’ll deal with Gee.” he smiled.
“mikey, it’s gotten a lot worse since frank left. Brian said the night after frank left he got a call from Gee. He’s gotten a few lately.”
“about what?”
“him saying he has a problem and the next one denying it.” I sighed and picked up Frank’s guitar.
“he needs help.”
“I know…. And I know just the person to do it.” I looked down at the guitar and smiled.
[hours later at 1 am.]
I walked out of the bunk area and stood in the bathroom. Gerard was on the phone with someone.
“no. I want to die. I’m making everyone’s life worse!” Gerard sounded different. He sniffled a lot and his words were slurred together.
I looked down. I moved closer to the door so I could hear.
“Alex for one. She wants to go back to jersey. And then there’s Frank, he left because of me.” Gerard started to cry, “my own sister told me she hated me. That I wasn’t her hero anymore! It fucking hurts Brian.” He covered his head on the table.
I looked down. If I knew I was going to make it so he wanted to kill himself I never would have said it. I wiped my eyes. I felt horrible.
“Brian I hurt her! I’ve never seen her so mad! I feel like I am the reason she wants to leave.”
My heart beat slowed down. I felt worse and worse as I listened to the conversation.
“alright. I’ll go wake him up. Bye.”
Gerard closed his phone and stood up. He walked towards the bathroom. I panicked.
“Alex?”
I looked up.
“why are you brushing your teeth at 1:30?”
“what gee? I like to be clean.” I smiled and walked by him. The moment I knew Gerard couldn’t see me the smile vanished. I sighed and sat on the edge of my bunk. Gerard had woken up our tour manager and was outside.
I heard the door open. I layed back in my bunk and closed the curtain. I leaned close enough to hear what they were saying.
“Gerard, if you ever need help. The whole band is here for you.” I heard Chris climb into his bunk.
“thanks, Chris.” Gerard walked into the living area. I got up quietly and walked out. Gerard had his head down on the table. I sat down across from him.
“Gee?”
“Alex?” his head shot up.
“I heard you before.”
“I kinda figured that.” he smiled weakly.
“Gerard, I’m sorry.”
“about what?”
“making you want to kill yourself.” I could feel the tears coming back.
There was a pause, “oh. It’s fine.”
“no gee. Don’t make it sound like it’s fine that you wanted to kill yourself. It’s not.”
“Alex…” he sighed, “I’ve decided to quit.”
“what do you mean quit? Quit the band? Quit life?!”
“No Alex. Quit drinking, doing drugs and overdosing on pills.” he looked down.
A smiled slowly appeared on my face. I reached over the table and hugged Gerard.
He smiled and hugged me back. I started to cry. I felt the tears pouring out of my eyes.
Chapter twenty-nine- the last night.
[Saturday night. After the concert. About 1am.]
[Ray’s POV]
“so, you’re really going?” I leaned on the wall.
“yeah.” Alex was wiping off the rest of her makeup.
“things won’t be the same without you.” I looked down.
“I’m sorry Ray. My mind is made up. I’m gonna miss you guys though.” She walked out of the bathroom.
“well, have fun back in New Jersey.” I sighed and walked into the back room. Michelle was sitting there.
“are you coming with us tomorrow?”
“to go where?” she looked up at me. She had tears running down her face.
“the airport.”
“no.” she looked back down at the ground.
“Why not?”
“I don’t want to watch that bitch leave.”
“what?” I looked at her in shock.
“I don’t want t see her leave. She was the reason I came on tour. She’s the reason I am dating mikey.” she sniffled, “I don’t care about that bitch anymore.”
“Michelle…” I sat next to her. “you guys are best friends. You should go, but I won’t make you.” I put my arm around her shoulders and pulled her in for a hug.
“whatever.”
[Regular POV]
I sighed as I put the rest of my stuff in the suit case. I walked into the back room to grab my guitar.
“hi Michelle.” I smiled weakly.
Michelle didn’t even bother to look up. I sighed and grabbed my guitar. I walked out of the room. I could feel tears building up. I knew Michelle hated me since I was leaving her. I couldn’t help but feel bad. Michelle was my first friend when I moved to Belleville.
I sighed and put my guitar in it’s case. I leaned back in my bunk. Everything was put into my suitcases expect for my laptop and a picture of me and Frank. I sighed and looked at the picture. I was on his shoulders after the concert. He was still in his make up and outfit. I was wearing my outfit that I had on when I played on stage for the first time. I had never been so happy. Atleast I will be back in his arms in a few hours.
I sighed and layed down. I was tired but falling asleep would be pointless since I had to be at the airport by 7. I looked down at me phone. 2:30 am.
I sighed and sat back up. I got out of my bunk and walked out into the living area. Mikey and Gerard were sitting on one couch while Bob was on the other.
“hi guys.” I barely spoke. I was still depressed I was leaving them.
“Hey Alex.” Gerard smiled. “it’s been 3 days.”
“congrats.” I smiled back and sat next to Bob.
“Lexi are you okay?”
“I guess. Michelle’s mad at me for leaving and shit.”
“Lexi, language.”
“sorry.” I looked down.
“well, I can’t really help. I’m sorry.” Mikey gave me a hug.
“it’s fine.” I looked down.
I sighed and leaned back. I felt like crap.
“Alex, you look sick.” Bob put his hand on my forehead. I looked over at him slightly.
“you’re burning up.”
I sighed, “I know.” I suddenly felt cold. I pulled my knees to my chest as I started to get dizzy.
“Alex go get some sleep.” Gerard looked over at me.
“no gee. I’m fine.” I forced a smile even thought I felt naushis.
“Alex, are you sure?” he put his hand on my forehead.
I nodded. He sighed and sat back down. My stomach started to feel funny. I got up and ran into the bathroom. I leaned over the toilet and threw up.
I knew someone had followed me since I felt them holding my hair back. I stood up and flushed the toilet.
“are you feeling any better?” Mikey asked as I walked out of the bathroom. Bob had been holding my hair back for me.
“a little.” I sat down on the couch. I could feel myself getting tired. I looked up at Bob who was sitting next to me. “Bob mind if I lay down?”
“no go ahead.” he smiled. I layed down, resting me head on his lap. He put his hand on my forehead. I whimpered since I felt sick again. I got up and ran to the bathroom. I sat on the floor. I didn’t have to throw up but I felt horrible. I sighed and stood back up. I walked out of the bathroom and over to my bunk. I climbed into my bunk and laid down, clutching the picture of me and Frank. I was crying really hard. I missed him a lot. I just wanted to be in his arms again.
I looked down at the time on my cell phone. 3:40am I sighed and covered my eyes with my arm. The tears continued to pour out of my eyes. My eyes were dry and sore. I coughed a lot. My head started to hurt worse and worse. I closed my eyes and started to fall asleep.
Chapter thirty- flight 613
I put my bag on the ground as I turned to the guys. The tears were flowing down my cheeks. I hugged Bob first. The tears poured down as wrapped my arms around him.
“Alex, I’ll miss you.” Bob sniffled.
“I’ll miss you too.” I let go and went to Ray. I looked at him and smiled weakly.
“I’ll miss you ray.” I hugged him.
“I’ll miss you too.” he put his arms around me.
Next was Mikey. He hugged me tightly. “lexi, every time I drink coffee I’ll think of you.”
I laughed a little, “same goes for me mikey.” I started to cry harder as he hugged me. I let go and walked over to Michelle. She looked down, “have fun.”
“it won’t be much fun with out you guys.” I sighed deeply.
“then why leave?”
“Michelle, I want to go be with Frank. And who knows I may come back soon.” I smiled weakly.
“I hope so.” she smiled back.
“so do I get a hug?” I laughed.
“HUGGIES FIX EVERYTHING!” she laughed and hugged me. I started to cry again.
“I’ll miss you.” she smiled as I let go.
“I’ll call you when I get home.” I smiled and walked over to Gerard.
I hugged Gerard tightly. The tears poured down.
“Alex, have fun back in jersey. We’ll miss you.” Gee said. You could tell he was crying.
“I’ll miss you too.”
“Flight 613 to Newark, New Jersey is now boarding.” a voice said over the intercom.
“bye guys.” I picked up my bad and walked over to the door. I handed the ticket to the lady. I looked back at the guys. I frowned and got on the plane. I took my seat and took out my ipod. I sighed and hit play. I looked down.
[10 minutes later]
The plane started to go down. My heart beat quickened. I saw my life flash before my eyes. I saw my last moments with Frank before he left. I saw Me and Michelle at the first MCR concert. I remembered how happy Frank had made me when we first started dating. My eyes started to water up as images of the guys flooded my mind. I saw the last goodbyes I ever said to them. That was the last time I will ever see them… I felt the impact from the crash. My head hit the back of the seat.
I woke up in a sweat and screaming. I sat up and brought my knees to my chest.
“lexi, are you okay?” Mikey sat on the edge of my bunk.
I shook my head and held on to him. I didn’t want to die like that. I didn’t want to leave them all. I felt Mikey pull me in closer.
“Lexi, it was just a dream.”
“but Mikey…. It was so real.” I cried and burried my face into his shirt.
“I know lexi. It’s okay though.”
I wish it was Mikey… but it never will be….
Chapter Thirty one- the airport surprise.
I looked over at the clock. 5:30 am. I sighed and grabbed my black skinny jeans and my black tank top and headed to the bathroom. I changed and started to do my makeup. I was still a little shaken from the dream and I didn’t feel really good. I knew I was going to start crying as I said my goodbyes to the guys so I didn’t put my make up on that heavy.
I pulled my hair back into a ponytail and left my bangs in my face. I headed back into the bunk area and put my clothes into my suitcase along with my laptop and picture. I closed it and stood back up. I reached into Frank’s bunk and grabbed his sweatshirt. I put it on and zippered it half way up. I sighed and grabbed my bags. I carried them into the living area.
“Ready?” Mikey looked at me and smiled weakly.
“yeah just a little nervous after the dream.” I looked out the window. We were almost at the airport. My heart started to race as we got closer.
[20 minutes later]
I put my stuff down and turned back to the guys. Everyone was upset. I walked over to Bob. I looked up at him and burst into tears. I hugged him.
“I’ll miss you so much bob.”
“promise me you’ll come to one of our concerts soon?”
“I promise Bob.” I smiled and let go, “I’ll be waiting back stage for you guys.”
I moved on to Ray.
“I feel like we barely got to hang out.” he hugged me.
“that’s because we barely did.” I smiled weakly, “I’ll try to spend more time with you when I see you guys again.” I wiped my eyes.
Next was Mikey. I fell into his arms crying.
“I hate good byes.” I wiped my eyes and looked up at him.
“so do I Lexi. But I’ll see you at one of the concerts.” he smiled weakly. I nodded and let go. I walked over to Gerard.
“you better stay sober.” I smiled weakly. “or I’ll kill you.”
“I will.” he laughed and hugged me. “have fun back in Jersey.” he let go.
There was only one person left. I walked over and stood in front of Michelle.
“Michelle, I am sorry.” I wiped my eyes.
“it’s fine.” she didn’t even bother to look up.
I sighed, “I’m sure I could get Frank to come back with in a few days. I promise I’ll be back. If not…. I’ll be at almost every concert.” I smiled.
“promise?” she looked up, “BITCH YOU BETTER!” she laughed and hugged me.
“I’ll miss you.” I smiled.
“I’ll miss you too.”
I let go and looked at everyone. “well,” I paused, “I’ll miss you guys.” I started to cry again.
“one more group hug?” Mikey asked opening his arms. I smiled as everyone got into the hug.
“flight 613 to Newark, New Jersey will be arriving shortly.” the voice said over the PA.
“I should get down to the gate.” I said picking up my bags.
“but you aren’t going to.” My heart stopped. I turned to where I heard the voice. Frank stood there with his arms crossed. He smiled at me. I stood in shock. I couldn’t move at all. I opened my mouth to talk but nothing came out.
I started to feel dizzy again. My body started to sway. My knee gave out and I fell forward. Frank caught me before I hit the ground.
“you okay Alex?” he kissed my forehead. My whole face was hot.
“why are you back here?” I looked up at him.
“I didn’t want you to come back to New Jersey. So instead of you going there, I came back.”
“but what about you and Gerard?”
“Gee called me and told me he had been sober for four days. I decided to come back.” he smiled. I burried my face in his shirt. I started to cry.
“what’s wrong?” he lifted my chin and looked me in the eyes. The tears were pouring from my eyes.
“I just can’t believe you are back!” I hugged him.
[later that day]
I smiled when I looked over at Frank. Mikey, Gerard, and Bob were getting coffee from star bucks and Ray was talking to Michelle about something.
“I see you liked to wear my sweatshirt the time I was gone.” he smiled.
“yeah. It made me feel like you were still here.” I smiled back and leaned on him. He put his arm around me.
“I missed you too.” he kissed my forehead slightly. “you know your hot right?”
“…. which meaning?” I laughed.
“Both.” he smiled. “but you look pale too. Are you feeling okay?”
I shrugged. I felt dizzy but it didn’t really matter at the moment.
“well, you want to go lay down?” Frank smiled.
“sure.”
“NO SEX!!” Michelle yelled as we walked into the bunk area. I laughed a little and climbed into my bunk. Frank climbed in and layed next to me. I rested my head on his chest and layed on my side. I put my arms around his chest.
“I love you.” I kissed him and put my head back on his chest.
[Frank’s POV]
Alex fell asleep instantly. I got up carefully, making sure not to wake her. I walked out to were the guys were. I sat across from Bob.
“oh frank. We’re going to be video taped for the life on the murder scene.” Mikey looked over at me.
“I know. Gee told me when he called.” I smiled.
“the only thing that sucks is Me and Alex are probably not going to be on it.” Michelle walked over and sat on Mikey’s lap. Mikey’s face turned red as she kissed him.
“what do you mean?” I looked at her.
“we aren’t going to be in interviews and like we probably are going to be associated as members of the crew.”
I laughed a little, “that sucks.”
“no shit.” she laughed.
[Regular POV]
I held Gerard in my arms. I started to cry as the blood gushed out of Gerard’s arms.
“Gee you can’t die! YOU JUST CAN’T!” the tears poured from my eyes. I couldn’t breathe. Gerard’s eyes opened slightly.
“Alex…. It’s fate…. This is supposed to happen.” his eyes closed and his body went limp. My heart stopped as I looked at him.
“Gerard….” I looked down at him. “I’m sorry.”
Everything faded to black. My eyes shot open. I got up and walked out into the living area. I was shaking really badly.
“Alex you look like you just saw a ghost.” Frank said as I sat on his lap.
“I wish it was that instead.” I put my head on his shoulder and closed my eyes. My voice was shaky.
“What’s wrong?” he asked as took a sip of soda.
“I’ve been having fucked up dreams lately. Last night I died on the plane back to Jersey and now Gerard died in my arms.”
“oh… wow…”
I wiped my eyes.
“it’s okay Alex. They are just dreams. They won’t come true.” he hugged me.
“I know.”
Ray turned the news on.
“flight 613 to Newark, New Jersey crashed today shortly after take off from an engine problem.”
My heart stopped.
“Alex?”
Chapter thirty two- …whoa… that was weird…..
I stared at the TV in shock. “no…. no….. this can’t be real! THIS HAS TO BE A DREAM!”
The guys started at me. Gerard walked into the room.
“what’s going on?”
“Alex, had a dream that her plane crashed the other night. And the plane she was supposed to be on crashed today.” Frank told him, “creepy huh?”
“yeah.” Gerard moved to my side. “Alex, you should sit down.”
I started to cry. When Gerard touched me it brought back the memory of the dream.
“Alex, relax.” Gerard sat next to me. “you weren’t on the plane so you didn’t die!”
“but Gerard, the other dream I had was of you dieing in my arms.”
Gerard looked at me in shock.
“ Gee I can’t let that one happen! I just can’t! I need you!” I covered my face.
“Alex, I won’t let that happen to me. Trust me.” he smiled.
I sniffled and hugged him.
[hours later]
Chris walked into the room. “Guys, I have great news.” he smiled, “The used is going to be joining the tour.”
“the used?” I looked up at him. I was laying down on the couch, messing around on my laptop. The bus pulled into the stadium.
“I’ll introduce you guys now.” Chris walked off the bus followed by the guys. Me and Michelle followed.
“do you know who the used are?” I looked at her.
“I have no clue.” Michelle ran to catch up with Mikey. I ran and grabbed Frank’s hand. He smiled and kept walking.
There was a group of guys talking by a tour bus. We walked over.
“Okay guys. This is Bert McCracken, Quinn Allman, and Jeph Howard.” Chris smiled.
“and this is my chemical romance. Gerard and Mikey Way, Ray Toro, Frank Iero and Bob Bryar.” I coughed. “oh and This is Alexandra Way, Mikey and Gerard’s sister. And Michelle Toro, Ray’s sister.”
I smiled and gave a shy wave. Michelle giggled, “HI!”